month 4. day 9

you knew id be hurt
you knew how long i would let this linger
you knew that this would bring me tears

yet you still said it
suddenly, brashly, and completely unconcerned

you call it lack of compassion
i call it insensitivity

i care not for compassion
i care for the fact that you decided to hurt me

month 4. day 8

in her attempt to walk in the sun, she got burned.

 

ive tried for the longest time to find something that gives more ‘sense’ to living and existing.

something that is present just cause it was created and formed and present to be present.

something that just fits.

 

ive been through the highest of highs and lowest of lows and im just tired.

tired of the endlessness of it

wishing that somehow it would just end.

like a denouement regardless of being sudden.

 

today i “vocalized” (cause ive been swirling on the thought of such) that i may be bisexual.

but i wish it (the “vocalization” of such) would have happened in a better state.

 

i have yet to understand this.

 

coffee count: 4

COFFEE COUNT TO DATE: countless.